The Adventures of Aaron Proctor

Greetings and salutations.

Wow! It’s an unusual Tuesday morning post from yours truly.  And, yes, I’m still unable to unmoderate comments.  I’ve got some things to get off my chest today, so please bear with me.

As a few of you know from conversations outside of the blogosphere, Kelli and I found this perfect guest house for rent over in District 3 back in January. 

It was a really great find.  A quaint one bedroom guest house on the back lot of a huge front house - you couldn’t even see the guest house from the street.  The house was bordered on two sides by businesses and the Smart & Final parking lot was behind the back yard.  Awesome for privacy and throwing parties.

There was also a cute little area of earth on the side of the house where I dreamed of growing tomatoes, something my father likes to do and something I’d like to start doing.  There was a driveway so we could park without worry of the People’s Republic of Pasadena Ministry of Parking. 

The best thing of all was that there were tenants already in the house, moving out in the middle of March, according to the landlord.  Kelli and I had the past 3 months to save up money, including a quick tax return from Mike Rotunda.  This month, we were both ready to begin looking at furniture and other amenities.

They always say “hindsight is 20/20.”  The first tip off that I shouldn’t have been dealing with this most unprofessional of landlords was when he lost my phone number.  The second tip off should have been when he forgot my name.  I guess, at the time, I figured he was a busy man.

The guy calls me last week to let me know his previous tenants had skipped town on him and hadn’t paid their last month of rent.  I informed him that due to our previous conversations, I still wouldn’t be ready to move in until the end of March.  He said that was totally o.k. 

So much for being totally o.k.  When I call the guy on Monday morning to set up a day where I can come over and measure the windows for curtains, he informs me that while showing the vacant front house, tons and tons of people kept asking about the back house.  At first he told me we had to move in by this coming weekend - and then he called me back 10 minutes later to inform me he’s giving the house away to “some other folks need it in 3 days.  Don’t worry, you’ll find something else.”

Now, before I say anything else, it was totally his right to give the house away.  It’s not like I put a deposit down or signed a contract with the dude.  He had every right to give the house to whomever he wanted.

Still, I feel pretty hoodwinked, bamboozled, and hornswoggled.  I feel as though I was lead on by someone who, let’s face it, shouldn’t really even be in the renting business.  How the fuck are you going to forget someone’s name who is about to be paying you nearly a grand a month?  How the heck are you going to lose your tenant’s phone number?  At least we still have money saved up and all that jazz - but still - this guy was a complete ham and egger. 

It’s back to the drawing board, trying to find another place here in Pasadena - which is hard as all hell. 

Somewhere, the Steve Madisons of the world are laughing at me.

**

If you don’t have one of these and are cool with it, chances are you’re a white person 

A friend of mine found a hilarious blog called “Stuff White People Like“.  Being half white, I find the website hilarious. 

Some things on the list include both the TV show and the rap group Arrested Development, lawyers, marathons, and assists.

**

Family man and fashion plate 

Breaking News.   We actually have a winner for the Fantasy City Council League season!  As Councilman Steve Haderlein sexily pointed out: rule #18, paragraph #c, amendment #12 states the first Councilmember to 100 points wins the Proctor Cup.  Congratulations to Steve H.  A formal presentation will be made during public comment at an upcoming City Council meeting.

** 

As you probably don’t know or don’t care about, The Pasadena Star News’ own 2003 winner of Pittsburgh’s Fred Rogers look-a-like contest, Larry Wilson, is the official “celebrity” guest for tomorrow morning’s monthly “Walk Around The Rose Bowl With The Mayor” shenanigans. 

I’ve actually obtained a list of other celebrities who were considered but finally denied their chance to walk with our 171 year old Mayor.

From the home office in Joe Piasecki’s refrigerator….

TOP TEN REJECTED CELEBRITIES FOR WALK WITH THE MAYOR

10.   Joe Piasecki

9.  That guy in the suit with dollar signs who screams and yells on informercials at 3 in the morning (second only to the guy screaming and yelling who sells baseball cards)

8.  Bob Ross

7.  Danny Bakewell

6.  My aunt Pearlene

5.  The sled from “Citizen Kane”

4.  That missing cop

3.  Willie Aames

2.  Ray Stevens

1.  Famed Pasadenan Sirhan Sirhan

Pasadena, where you at?

- AP

Hey everybody!

Let’s get right to it, shall we?  O.k.

Earlier this week I made eight phone calls.  Those eight phone calls were to the Mayor and every member of City Council. 

What was I calling about, exactly?  Term limits?  Surprise birthday party for Ann Erdman?  Measure D complaints?  Inviting them to Pleasures for lunch?

Not really.  I just had two simple questions.  The first question was “What was the name of your first pet?”  The second question was “What was the name of the first street you grew up on?”  I received only seven replies, most likely due to the fact one Councilmember is probably out of town or something.  I even got a reply from Steve Madison - whom I quickly cut off before he went into some tirade about how I had a “relapse” of making fun of him.  Also Victor Gordo wanted me to let you all know that Lena Kennedy isn’t running against him in `09 - because “she told [him] that herself.”  (Edit:  Also forgot to mention - I didn’t speak with Bill, but I spoke with his wife, Claire.  She knew what street he grew up on and she used their first pet’s name.)

Anyone who is Internet or urban legend savvy (which seemed to only be one of the Councilmembers) knows those two questions usually produce the answer to a meme known as “What is your porn star name?”

Some of the names are downright hilarious.  Without further suspense, here are the results:

PASADENA CITY COUNCIL PORN STAR NAMES

Mayor Bill Bogaard

Porn Star Name:  Sophocles Westfourth

Jacque Robinson 

Porn Star Name:  Bingo Howard

Chris Holden

Porn Star Name:  Spot Summit

Steve Haderlein

Porn Star Name:  Bruno Paloma

Victor Gordo

Porn Star Name:  Brandy Corson

Steve Madison

Porn Star Name:  Osa Morse

Sid Tyler

Porn Star Name:  Socky Lane

Update: City of Pasadena PIO Ann Erdman

Porn Star Name:  Missy Valencia

The funniest thing about asking all of those questions is the only person who caught on to my little project was Bingo Howard.  It just goes to show you that youth isn’t such a bad thing when it comes to the Crown City’s politics after all.

Speaking of Mayor Sophocles and the gang, they had a meeting on Monday.  Dormitas did some excellent coverage over at his blog.  Their new porn star names must give “blow-by-blow” a whole new meaning.

**

Socky Lane & Dick LeBeau In “Bulldozin’”

Thanks to Dormitas, I can also update my much-needing-updating Fantasy City Council scores (or as some call it, “The Proctor Cup”):

Western Conference

Council Member / Total Points (Points Earned This Week)

1. District 3 - Chris Holden - 73 (10)
2. Mayor Bill Bogaard - 50 (5)
3. District 1 - Jacque Robinson - 42 (5)
4. District 6 - Steve Madison - 16 (0)
***

Eastern Conference

1. District 4 - Steve Haderlein - 100 (30)
1. District 5 - Victor Gordo - 85 (15)
3. District 7 - Sid Tyler - 75 (20)
4. District 2 - Margaret McAustin - 60 (10) 

It’s an interesting contest, especially when that pesky “Aaron Proctor Scoring System” comes into play. 

**

I’ll be back tomorrow (hopefully!) with more shenangians from the Crown City.

Big up to the Dena.

- A to the P

Not having Internet access for nearly a week totally sucks horse penis. Especially when I was going to return to my lampooning of Pasadena City Council meetings et al. A big thank you goes to Kelly over at West Coast Grrlie Blather for letting you all know that my computer access is limited at the moment due to a computer problem, most likely caused by a power outage I had sometime on Sunday during the “rain storm”. I happened to be in Hollywood filming stuff for this website with Kelli and then proceeded to hang out in Orange County all day when this occured - so maybe it’s punishment for going to my former stomping grounds (the former) and behind the Orange Curtain.

I’m on a friend’s computer right now which really isn’t technologically advanced - so I can’t do this entry with my famous boldface type of people’s names, links to obscure references, and pictures. I haven’t even been able to check e-mails at my personal address in a few days - but I promise I will get to them soon. Please forgive me. I hope to be “back full time” in Blogadena quite soon. Oh - and thanks to those of you for the phone calls - I know that, in recent times, when I go off the radar for a few days, it usually means something bad happened like losing a job or having to move to St. Louis. I assure you, aside from the lack of Interwebs, everything is hunky dorky. And, no, I’m not siding with the Writer’s Guild of America.

The thing that sucks the most is there’s tons of stuff to talk about right now - locally and nationally. I don’t really cover national politics too much here - I mean, there’s so many other places you can read people’s opinions on that stuff - but I found myself glued to the television during the Iowa Caucus and the New Hampshire Primaries. It’s definitely an unpredictable time for national politics at the moment.

And look at the wackiness we’ve got going on locally - well, it is “Doo Dah Parade” season - Wayne “Pasadena Pundit” Lusvardi turned down the accolades of the coveted Thorny Rose award because we all apparently think he’s the devil or the antichrist - this from a guy who once compared me to a Roman argur…maybe we should re-name the Pasadena Pundit another p-word that rhymes with “Wussy”.  Well, maybe not totally - Mr. Lusvardi did give me some props on my “Measure D For Dumbass” article:

 

the Proctorologist hits the nail on the head. Also see http://www.crgovernment.net/ Best WL

Oh yeah - some guy in Tujunga murders some people and then jumps off Suicide Bridge to his death (leading me to want to re-name the bridge Murder-Suicide Bridge)….

Paul Little sort of tells it like it is in the Pasadena Weekly….and the remaining living cast of “Misfits of Science” did a beer run at the Ralph’s on Lake & Walnut. Ok, not so much about the last one.

Having all of this “time away from the Internet”, I have been glued to cable news, have actually been *purchasing* the Star-News (that’s 50 cents I could be giving to Sally Struthers for Twinkies) and reading the hard copies of the Weekly and the Hizpokins Journalizzy. I’ve also caught up with some reading - particularly an awesome “Legends of Pro-Wrestling” book that Robin Salzer, friend and owner of the best restaurant in the world, got me for Christmas. I finished watching the entire third season of “The Office” and am hoping to wrap my eyes around “Blade Runner: The Final Cut” ASAP.

I also have a running bet with my girlfriend that if Hillary Clinton is elected President, I’m turning Republican. But the cool kind of Republican - you know - small government and not annoying people’s personal freedoms. No religious right for me. I’m serious. Watch out Gene Masuda and the PRC.

With all of that said - I hope everyone is enjoying the New Year so far. I’ll be back with a vengeance (not really) soon. And, yes, I am going insane with “blogging withdrawl”. Luckily, there’s this odd combination of things I’ve discovered called “pen and paper”..it’s really magical and led me to write a sort of amusing Top Ten List:

TOP TEN TIP-OFFS YOU WON’T BE CHOSEN FOR PASADENA CITY MANAGER

10. Even Bill Paparian thinks you’re odd.

9. You’re the guy who played Boner on “Growing Pains”.

8. You can drink Cynthia Kurtz under the table.

7. Your biggest claim-to-fame is 6,000,000 points on SimCity.

6. Your resume is written on a Carl’s Jr. napkin.

5. You are a former federal prosecutor.

4. Carl Kozlowski is one of your personal references.

3. Your first order of business, if chosen, is to rename Old Town Pasadena “Bitchin’ Sweet Shoppin’ Place”

2. You’re the dude who wrote that “You Won’t Get A Lemon” radio commercial.

1. Barney Melekian has personally arrested you seven times.

Stand & deliver.

- AP

Somewhere a bottle of Grey Goose is sad to see Cynthia Kurtz go…

That’s right!

Coupled with Dormitas’ excellent blow-by-blow coverage on his website, Fantasy City Council League makes its return for the “second half” of the interrupted season this Monday!

Here’s the scores from when we last left off (And yes, scores will be adjusted on Monday to reflect how everyone did in the Year End Awards):

Western Conference

Council Member / Total Points (Points Earned This Week)

1. District 3 - Chris Holden - 63 (10)
2. Mayor Bill Bogaard - 45 (0)
3. District 1 - Jacque Robinson - 37 (0)
4. District 6 - Steve Madison - 16 (0)
***

Eastern Conference

1. District 4 - Steve Haderlein - 70 (10)
1. District 5 - Victor Gordo - 70 (2)
3. District 7 - Sid Tyler - 55 (5)
4. District 2 - Margaret McAustin - 50 (10)

Oh and here’s Monday’s riveting agenda.

And correct me if I’m wrong but does the Closed Session they’re having indicate City Council is thinking about suing something or someone?

54956.9. Nothing in this chapter shall be construed to prevent a
legislative body of a local agency, based on advice of its legal
counsel, from holding a closed session to confer with, or receive
advice from, its legal counsel regarding pending litigation when
discussion in open session concerning those matters would prejudice
the position of the local agency in the litigation.
For purposes of this chapter, all expressions of the lawyer-client
privilege other than those provided in this section are hereby
abrogated. This section is the exclusive expression of the
lawyer-client privilege for purposes of conducting closed-session
meetings pursuant to this chapter.
For purposes of this section, “litigation” includes any
adjudicatory proceeding, including eminent domain, before a court,
administrative body exercising its adjudicatory authority, hearing
officer, or arbitrator.
For purposes of this section, litigation shall be considered
pending when any of the following circumstances exist:
(a) Litigation, to which the local agency is a party, has been
initiated formally.
(b) (1) A point has been reached where, in the opinion of the
legislative body of the local agency on the advice of its legal
counsel, based on existing facts and circumstances, there is a
significant exposure to litigation against the local agency.
(2) Based on existing facts and circumstances, the legislative
body of the local agency is meeting only to decide whether a closed
session is authorized pursuant to paragraph (1) of this subdivision.

(3) For purposes of paragraphs (1) and (2), “existing facts and
circumstances” shall consist only of one of the following:
(A) Facts and circumstances that might result in litigation
against the local agency but which the local agency believes are not
yet known to a potential plaintiff or plaintiffs, which facts and
circumstances need not be disclosed.
(B) Facts and circumstances, including, but not limited to, an
accident, disaster, incident, or transactional occurrence that might
result in litigation against the agency and that are known to a
potential plaintiff or plaintiffs, which facts or circumstances shall
be publicly stated on the agenda or announced.
(C) The receipt of a claim pursuant to the Tort Claims Act or some
other written communication from a potential plaintiff threatening
litigation, which claim or communication shall be available for
public inspection pursuant to Section 54957.5.
(D) A statement made by a person in an open and public meeting
threatening litigation on a specific matter within the responsibility
of the legislative body.
(E) A statement threatening litigation made by a person outside an
open and public meeting on a specific matter within the
responsibility of the legislative body so long as the official or
employee of the local agency receiving knowledge of the threat makes
a contemporaneous or other record of the statement prior to the
meeting, which record shall be available for public inspection
pursuant to Section 54957.5. The records so created need not
identify the alleged victim of unlawful or tortious sexual conduct or
anyone making the threat on their behalf, or identify a public
employee who is the alleged perpetrator of any unlawful or tortious
conduct upon which a threat of litigation is based, unless the
identity of the person has been publicly disclosed.
(F) Nothing in this section shall require disclosure of written
communications that are privileged and not subject to disclosure
pursuant to the California Public Records Act (Chapter 3.5
(commencing with Section 6250) of Division 7 of Title 1).
(c) Based on existing facts and circumstances, the legislative
body of the local agency has decided to initiate or is deciding
whether to initiate litigation.
Prior to holding a closed session pursuant to this section, the
legislative body of the local agency shall state on the agenda or
publicly announce the subdivision of this section that authorizes the
closed session. If the session is closed pursuant to subdivision
(a), the body shall state the title of or otherwise specifically
identify the litigation to be discussed, unless the body states that
to do so would jeopardize the agency’s ability to effectuate service
of process upon one or more unserved parties, or that to do so would
jeopardize its ability to conclude existing settlement negotiations
to its advantage.
A local agency shall be considered to be a “party” or to have a
“significant exposure to litigation” if an officer or employee of the
local agency is a party or has significant exposure to litigation
concerning prior or prospective activities or alleged activities
during the course and scope of that office or employment, including
litigation in which it is an issue whether an activity is outside the
course and scope of the office or employment.

Like I said, correct me if I’m wrong.

- AP

Some new faces of 2007 (From left to right): District 1 Councilwoman Jacque Robinson, District 2 Councilwoman Margaret McAustin, and “Planny” - the Planning Commission dalmatian.

By the power vested in me by hyperlinking and blog archiving, here’s a shout out to the year 2007 - one of the most memorable years of not only my life but Pasadena’s as well.
2007 was definitely a year that saw both challenges for me in my personal life and for the City of Pasadena. While my life saw me unjustly fired from two jobs in the same year and subsequently being exiled to St. Louis, Pasadena saw gang violence, strip club buy outs, Rose Bowl float drama, door hanger drama, developer drama, high school football game drama, a police chief doubling as a City Manager, long-time PUSD board members upset from their seats, and lots, lots more.

Kimberley Brown ran against Steve Madison in the District 6 Council election. I’d like to have her in my polling place, if you catch my drift.

The year started out with some exciting Council and PUSD board races - all culminating with the March Primary election and the April runoff election (well, the latter if you didn’t get trounced by Mayor Bogaard).

Danny Bakewell made hell for Council to quell.

This very blog blossomed and came into its own a few weeks after the dust cleared from the election. As you’ll see, this site started out as my own personal campaign site. After the election, it became a place where I continually posted my attempts at comedic musings, controversial rants, controversial musings, and comedic rants (Ha!).
Ever since late March or early April, this site has become a favorite of elected officials, political candidates, anonymous pundits, newspaper reporters, crazy liberal bitches, bitches with smokin’ bodies, family members, erstwhile school board members, losers on professional wrestling message boards, Nigerian porno spammers, and Average Joes.

Local bloggers Centinel (left) and Dormitas (right).

And it’s not just this blog either. The entire blogsophere - moreso Blogadena - has grown to be quite the influential source from everything like straight information to complete ridicule of/on our leaders. More people pay attention to what goes on at historic City Hall than ever before. Let’s band together and make 2008 even more memorable!

When I was a kid, I was a big fan of those “Choose Your Own Adventure” books. So why not sit a spell and do just that - choose your own Proctor-guided adventure in the archives of 2007.

• January
• February
• March
• April
• May
• June
• July
• August
• September
• October
• November
• December
• Febtabuary

Breakdown: 2007 In Numbers

• 195,000: The number of total hits for the year 2007 this site will reach sometime just before the end of the year.
• 8: The number of people on City Council (including the Mayor) who read this blog.
• Approximately 2300: The number of times the word ‘fuck’ is used on this site.
• 47: The number of times I’ve pissed people off.
• 86 minutes: The amount of time it takes Mayor Bogaard to finish a sentence.
• 48: Updated - number of times I’ve pissed people off.
• 3,000,000: The number of people I pissed off in the St. Louis area.
• $5,000,000: The amount the City spent to rid it of a strip club (the amount invested in to gang violence was far less).
• 40: Ounces of King Cobra goodness.
• $10 million: The amount Victor Gordo claimed we need in order to pay our police officers and fire fighters, in support of 2008’s worst decision, Measure D.
• $25 million: The amount in surplus the City actually will have. So why do we need Measure D again?
• 65,000 or so: The number of registered voters in Pasadena
• 5: The number of registered voters in Pasadena who vote
• 4: The number of registered voters in Pasadena who can name the Mayor or any member of City Council
• 73: The number of times Joe Hopkins attributed gang violence to a late 80’s or early 90’s hip hop group
• 8,294: The number of hours for entire City Council meetings this year
• 277: The number of times Jim Lomako used the phrase “granny flats” during the District 2 election
• 3,156: The amount of people who think things located just above Washington & Allen are part of incorporated Pasadena and not unincorporated Pasadena or Altadena.
• 1472: The number of geniuses in Pasadena.

Some Things I Learned In 2007

• John Shaft is a complicated man and no one understands him but his woman.
• Sid Tyler doesn’t use e-mail, he uses fe-male.
• The Midwest isn’t good for anything except cheap alcohol and cheap cigarettes.
• No MTA or ARTS bus in Pasadena is ever on time.
• Martin Truitt is 7 feet tall, weighs 650 pounds, and lives in a cave under the Allen Gold Line station.
• Running for office doesn’t get you a burger named after you. Calling the owner of a restaurant a ‘dick’ in the Pasadena Weekly does.
• Ace Star-News reporter Todd Ruiz and I have both seperately had sexual relations with this one chick back in our younger days. She had good taste.  UPDATE (Dec 27, 2007):  Chick pulls a Steve Madison and cries to me about this.  I took her picture down…here’s the e-mail I sent back:

  Because I'm a nice guy, a paragon of virtue, an icon, a superstar, role
  model, genius, et al....and since it's Kwanzaa, I'll take down your
  picture from that entry.
  
  It's a shame you don't have a sense of humor.  Then again, that's why
  you're a 30 year old Goth chick.
  
  - AP
  www.proctorformayor.com

• This chick on Law & Order: SVU reminds me of Jane Rodriguez.
• The Philadelphia Eagles and the Philadelphia Phillies are responsible for breaking my heart twice.
• Giving up the eyeliner and the eyeshadow and the weird clothes has been one of the better decisions I’ve made in life.
• Pasadena needs a Wendy’s and an Arby’s.
• City Council public comment cards make decent paper airplanes.
• Steve Haderlein is a sexy mofo.
• The hairstyle that Emo kids have is called a “Cry shield”. The kind of kids who listen to Emo are called “eleven-teens”.
• Jill organizes fun picnics.
• Former District 2 City Councilman Paul Little used steroids between his 2001 and 2003 terms.
• That guy on Orange Grove isn’t going to use the 50 cents you gave him to buy food.

I guess that all sums up 2007.
Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!

- AP

Attented the Council meeting live until about 9:15 p.m. Sat with “Mr. Thursday Morning” Andre Coleman from the Weekly. Ran into a cavalcade of known Pasadenans. Todd Ruiz was there. Joe Brown from the NAACP was there and even spoke - and he’s such a cool speaker. Here’s my blow-by-blow (as Dormitas calls it) from my yellow pad o’ paper.

Steve Madison enjoys a soda.

• No City Manager decision in the closed session. Oh joy.
• I was interviewed by KTLA. No idea if it did or didn’t air.
• All present. Sid Tyler was out there first, carrying a machine gun.
• Madison leads the pledge, has a garish bow-tie on
• Sid Tyler has a ceremonial matter with the Russians. Makes me think of Milena Albert, whom I saw talking to Martin Truitt later on. Damn that lucky bastard.
• Public Comment starts and takes up the majority of the night.
• I fill out a Comment card.
• Report from the Human Relations Commission - basically, we shouldn’t oppose the float but we should make a resolution against Human Relations - and specifically target China on this.
• Talk already begins of making an Ad Hoc Committee. Yeah, I’m sure that’s gonna work. Madison even says later at the end of the night that he hates the idea.
• I saw Jim Lomako arrive. He spoke after I left.
• Young Jacque asks for a comment card from the Tournament of Roses - Bogaard informs us all they won’t be speaking tonight, they just wrote a letter.
• President of Sister Cities explains that Sister Cities don’t get involved in matters like this. Later on, El Pollo disagrees with good reason - saying Einsenhower created the Sister City program to open dialogues on a local level.
• Bob McCloskey, a 10-year Union organizer quotes Tip O’Neill and says the float should not happen. We’ve got a ton of anti-floaters and a few pro-floaters here tonight, including some yuppie kid from University of Redlands business school.
• Many Falun Gong people - along with John Li et al. - are there. There were some very horrible, scary, emotional stories told. Can’t make fun of that whatsoever. Various people cried when they told stories of their torture. City Council looked shocked and bored at the same time.
• Crazy Poem Lady had a crazy poem. I’ve got video of City Council’s reaction to it.
• Where’s my Chow Mein? I ordered it an hour ago. For some reason, I’m really hungry for Chinese food. No idea why.

Bogaard lookin’ at his sweet bitches.

• The fucking squeaky door in Council quarters is annoying.
• I get to talk to Margaret McAustin’s husband, John, on Martin Truitt’s cell phone. He was watching on TV.
• Madison steps out of the quarters for a little bit to adjust his bow tie.
• Some guy from the Tournament of Roses comes up whose name I didn’t catch but apparently he’s pretty well known. Said he’s not there as a represent of the TOR and then PROCEEDS TO DO A TOP TEN LIST. TOP TEN LISTS!? It wasn’t even that funny..well, it was the kind of funny that made Council giggle a few times - so - not funny.
• It was my turn to speak and I was going to mention the guy using a Top Ten List but a Falun Gong member who was imprisoned in China spoke before me and the mood got serious - I told Council that I know they won’t overturn the Float idea, that it’s embarassing to have the Float in the parade, and that I hope they make a resolution that actually makes sense and actually does something - not just a “look at me” Ad Hoc Committee.
• Got a pamphlet from a Falun Gong member which shows the atrocities done to Falun Gong members. Sickening shit.
• Went home to watch on TV.
• Sexy Haderlein wants a committee. I like how Gordo is taking a super stand.
• They’re talking about forming an Ad Hoc Committee now. Most people are not for it.
• Madison thinks committee is bullshit, Holden supports the Committee because Chris Holden supports it. Basically, a lot of talk and nothing will get done. Bogaard recuses himself from everything..even though legally he didn’t have to, it was a smart move..or a “look at me” move.
• Bogaard looks up “endorse” in the dictionary.
• Iron Maggie commends the Human Relations Commission for making a report.
• General Pasadena “We Only Care About International Politics When It’s Convenient For Us To” Consensus: “Human Rights Violations suck…and that’s how we feel. Moving on to finding a City Manager.” Tyler suggests he goes into China with his fists and a Chicken Pot Pie.
• Council wants to send letters to our Senators. Dianne Feinstein never writes back to people!
• Council endorses an old UN resolution, “in principle” to quote Bogaard on Human Rights and denounces Human Rights violations. Wants Human Relations Comm. to make a formal statement to China..well, sort of. Haderlein says renouncing human relations violations seems redundant. It’s not sexy enough.
• Holden gives a good speech about people needing to pay more attention to things and how not enough people do and that it’s right for people to come and speak out against this whole thing.
• So, really nothing got done.

Sid Tyler lookin’ to kick ass and take names. Or just sit quietly.
I’m sick of Ad Hoc Committees - especially ones that won’t make a huge difference.

Here’s what I mean. For example, I don’t like avocados. I don’t think they taste good. I can make statement after statement that I don’t like avocados until fuck all - it won’t matter, they’ll still make avocados.

I think Council is smart for letting the HRC work on this - still, I feel they should make a statement..and not just a broad one. Let the world know that even though we’re gonna have this Float (the Olympic Float, not the China Float as that TOR guy socked on the Star-News about) - we should still say “We don’t like what China’s doing” and not support anything else they try to pull in Pasadena until they fix their policies.

Sadly, this was the Human Relations Commission 15 minutes of fame - and even more sadly, a lot of people there who thought the float was going to get removed are seriously disappointed. They should pay attention to the “Pasadena Way” a lot more.

I said my piece. Now let’s try to move on and hope that Pasadena is starting to notice more people are paying attention and City Council can’t just “do what they want” anymore..or at least, without a good fight.

Thanks for embarassing us on the World stage, Pasadena. Here’s your Fantasy City Council scores:
Western Conference

Council Member / Total Points (Points Earned This Week)

1. District 3 - Chris Holden - 63 (10)
2. Mayor Bill Bogaard - 45 (0)
3. District 1 - Jacque Robinson - 37 (0)
4. District 6 - Steve Madison - 16 (0)
***

Eastern Conference

1. District 4 - Steve Haderlein - 70 (10)
1. District 5 - Victor Gordo - 70 (2)
3. District 7 - Sid Tyler - 55 (5)
4. District 2 - Margaret McAustin - 50 (10)

I (heart) Pasadena, just not their International policy and Steve Madison’s bow-tie.

UPDATE:  Top Ten guy was TOR volunteer, Fred Sodwidel.
- AP

As you may know, District 4 Councilman “Sexy” Steve Haderlein has a 2 point lead over District 5 Councilhombre Victor Gordo De Arteaga Y El Individuo Que Tiene Gusto Del Pollo, De Deportes, Y De Tener Conversaciones De La Diversión Con Steve Madison Durante Reuniones in the Fantasy City Council League.

El Pollo Gordo wants us all to know that he’s going to bounce back and win the Conference and the upcoming playoffs as well!

- AP

Here’s a simulcast of coverage from Dormitas at Pasadena’s Political Underbelly.  Quite hilarious.  Dormitas is My Favorite Person Of The Week:

After torturing her paraplegic ex-husband, Celia discovered that Nancy is still selling pot. A private detective hired by Peter’s ex shakes down Nancy but gets some of his own back. The ex gets totally screwed over. Oh, sorry that’s Weeds, the really entertaining Monday night show.

As for Pasadena’s main event:

Council held off on the big decision — are we in an emergency over Utility Taxes. I’d feel better if they were waiting for November 5th because they wanted to see if the City of Pasadena has enough other money to give the taxpayers a break on this one, but they’re really just looking for political cover and to get this off the front page of the paper. Nice move Bogus Bill and Co.

Mayor Bogus Bill started by talking about how important the meetings are. Human Relations commission gave out a model of unity award to their pals: CCFS Head Start and one of the commissioners eve talked about what Head Start did for her family and about her being on the CCFS board. Hey, let’s give ourselves an award, huh guys?

PUBLIC COMMENT:

Chinese stuff again. This time Teresa Moreau talked about oppression of Catholic religion by China and used an example of a bishop in China. No berets this time. A loss of style points this week.

Woman named Genvieve with a great French accent complained about PCC used for propaganda meeting. She was appalled. It was appalling!

Bill Watkins weekly wacko showed up again and talked about native America and founding for Pasadena. Nut job in a red hat with sunglasses.

CONSENT CALENDAR passed with no objections then McAustin said it’s about time the Lake Avenue clock tower (clock tower!) got approved and wanted temporary bus shelters on the overpass.

Holdens condo conversion thing got passed.

TYLER CALL FOR REVIEW

It’s all about trees. One apartment building wants to get rid of a tree and another to remove a tree in somebody’s yard. Tyler’s willing to have a tree damage a house instead of removing it. He’s his own expert and said it looked ok to him to keep it.

JACK SCOTT SHOW:

Another state legislator back-patting extravaganza. Scott walks on water, in his own mind anyway. Scott claims to have 158 bills that got signed. If we believe him, he’s done everything but invent the Internet. But damn, Scott’s a smooth talker and well-loved local pol who’s hoping to get another term if the voters change term limit rules. He’s helped city college students and nurses. The man never leaves the campaign stump. He’s gonna be the champion for the uninsured and water. Lotsa inside baseball. Andy Griffith, I mean Jack Scott, is gonna do everything but put the wild fires out. Maybe if he pisses in the wind?

My favorite was the guy behind Scott in the audience who was almost giggling through the self-love fest.

Council people want Scott to be a leader bringing $$$ to Pasadena for stuff like parks. Pick a pet peeve and the councilmember wants Scott to lead. Liquor stores, health care, group homes,

Funny how little Scott fessed up to knowing about what matters to the council and I guess Pasadena.

We can appreciate Scott’s not from La Canada.

Caroline Chaney a city lobbying woman talked about what she’s getting paid to do.

CONFERENCE CENTER EXPANSION UPDATE

They spent $46 million and got a bog hole and some cement to show for it. Pasadena folks are getting hired on the job. That a real GOOD THING but, if I’m a bad school board member and politi-pal of Mayor Bogus Bill can I get paid too? We gotta ask why Prentice Deedrick is involved in local hiring stuff and how much he’s getting in poli-payback.

PUBLIC HEARING ABOUT SEWER FEE FOR NEW CUSTOMERS

Seems to makes sense that new users of the sewer need to pay for the costs they cause. But, when does this start costing me money?

That’s coming: Tyler said there’s gonna be a hearing in December about raising our sewer rates.

Boost my electric rate, boost my water rate, boost my sewer rate. What’s next? Boost my car? Boost my wallet?

STOREFRONT IMPROVEMENT PLAN

Give $10K or $20K or $25K to businesses to fix the front of their stores. Sounds great, but then they changed it so it’s pork in their own districts.

Sometimes our local pols make the staff people look good, like with this one. Council people aren’t even paying attention. AirHeaderlein wins the nights stupid question award by not paying attention.

ELECTRIC COMPANY TECHNO-BABBLE ITEM

No idea what’s going on about transferring “capacity product”. What the hell are these folks talking about, anyway? It’s how some companies can get paid for electricity credits. Sounds like an electric shell game to me. The staff guy talked forever about this and nobody was paying attention or even knew what he was saying. Nobody asked if it’s gonna cost me or you $$$?

VACATIONS (not Council leaving town for our good but giving away parts of the street to private people)

Council’s giving public property away to grocery stores and

GIVING MONEY TO EPISCOPAL HOUSING DO-GOODERS TO BUY PROPERTY

Gonna give away some money to these guys to start a small business incubator to pay $425,000 for property on San Gabriel Blvd. for Mama’s Hot Tamales to help people learn about restaurant and catering business. Does AirHeaderlein know Spanish speakers are gonna be coming there? Who’s Joe Coletti that the Council wants to give him so much $$$? A donor to Bogus Bill Bogaard’s political pals maybe? There was some talk about if this was according to city rules, but everybody passed this anyway.

AirHeaderlein saying Mama’s Hot Tamales probly sent Aaron Proctor into a frenzy of self abuse, but man is this Steve empty-headed. That might be what AP finds sexy. Plain old dumbness.

Best part was Holden trying to leverage the deal into his district. Porking the porker here, dude! Gordo came off pretty well on this one.

RAISING MONEY BY ASKING ME IF I WANT TO PAY EXTRA FOR MY PHONE AND CABLE TV

What do I think about this special election? Put it on the ballot guys, so we can vote for the city to get off its own wallet and spend money its already got before you dip into my pocket. I like the comment from contributor Miss H. that burning up So Cal is an emergency not Utility User Tax.

AirHeaderlein asked for a definition of emergency. Our council defining emergency is kinda like Clinton defining sex, except instead of Monica Lewinsky getting a mouthful, we’re getting totally f**ked.

They talked all about the words they want to use to sell this thing in February and no talk about looking someplace else for the $$$.

It’s not a new tax, so Bogus Bill can say he didn’t vote for new taxes. Doom and gloom: we’re gonna lose cops and parks and all the good stuff we like. Translation for all of us: We pay and Pasadena stays fat and happy on its overstuffed wallet, PERIOD! Remember when we all paid higher electric rates to save the power company? Now I’m paying more than most everybody in CA for electricity but the power company’s got lots of $$$. And how much do all those city workers get paid? Oh yeah, we got two councilmembers who work for unions, so we’re bent over for them, too.

Is our city council looking after me and my family or looking after unions and city workers?

How about I just leave my wallet on the sidewalk along Garfield Ave and Gordo can come by and pick the money out every week.

MORE PUBLIC COMMENTERS

A squirrley dude called Ethan Fog,really, his name was Fog, complained about red curbs. He’s worried about where people are going to put their trash cans.

The night’s BIG news: I was gonna tell everybody to look at proctorformayor.com for another take on the meeting but, if you can believe this: Aaron Proctor skipped the meeting to go shopping at Old Navy! OLD NAVY!

I’ve had enough for one week. Previews of coming attractions: Just in time for Halloween the council’s gonna talk about China, human rights and the China Gloat…er Float in the Rose Parade. How many Chinese forced labor slaves does it take to make a lead-painted Barbie doll, anyway?

D.

Always good stuff from Dormitas.  Seems like I missed some fun (and apparently some “self abuse” when Sexy Haderlein mentioned hot tamales - which, yeah, probably would have happened).  Yeah, I like them with low IQ’s.   And Sid Tyler is an expert on everything.  Holden’s condo conversion moratorium got passed - so Holden thanks his best friend, Holden. I (heart) City Council.
Here’s the scores in the FCCL:

Western Conference

Council Member / Total Points (Points Earned This Week)

1. District 3 - Chris Holden - 53 (10)
2. Mayor Bill Bogaard - 45 (5)
3. District 1 - Jacque Robinson - 37 (5)
4. District 6 - Steve Madison - 16 (0)
***

Eastern Conference

1. District 4 - Steve Haderlein - 70 (10)
2. District 5 - Victor Gordo - 68 (5)
3. District 7 - Sid Tyler - 50 (20)
4. District 2 - Margaret McAustin - 40 (10)

Holden goes a bit ahead of Bogaard, Tyler gets some major points, and Haderlein has a two point lead over Gordo.

Next week is going to be a HUGE City Council meeting, regarding China’s participation in the Rose Parade.  I’ll be there LIVE for, hopefully, most of the meeting.  You should be there too.  It’s very important we all come out of the woodwork for this one.

- AP

City Council. October 15, 2007. Live Blogging Notes. Starring your full, complete, and present City Council.

• I “live blogged” this meeting with continuous updates.
• Janette Williams from the Star-News called me earlier today for a quote about the Doo Dah Parade but I missed the deadline. Fuck. Her British accent is HAWT. I’m not joking.
• Meeting starts 20 minutes late. Bogaard apologizes. Move the damn thing to 7 p.m.
• Everyone present. Girl Scout Group learning about leadership. Alex Zucco (reader of my blog and pretty hot chick) has a daughter who leads the council in the Pledge. Awesome job.
• Anthony Portantino in front row. He’s packing heat. Go get your fuckin’ shinebox.
• Roberta Martinez (former PUSD) thanks the Council for the Latino Heritage Parade. Mentions that the “170 year old Mayor” was there. Gordo comments on what my good friend Roberta said and says he never made that comment. Bogaard says “I know who made that comment.” and everyone laughs. That was one of my original campaign ads, the 170 year old Mayor. Yep, I’m getting indirectly mentioned at Council meetings now. I love you Roberta Martinez. Awesome. (Edit: It was actually Gordo who made the 170 year old comment - I love you too, Victor)
• Hot chick in beret says something about China. All I heard was blah, blah, blah, Communish, blah, blah, nice tits, blah, blah.
• Benita Sager from Altadena speaks about racial injustice. Got booted from her home for reporting some crimes against her. Bogaard tells her to call the Fair Housing Council in Pasadena. She says she did that and she feels like everyone sticks together and she was not treated fairly. Sounds legit. She wants the City of Pasadena to take a look at the language in landlord/tenant contracts. Holden gets involved. Holden and Kurtz back and forth - just asking about landlords being on the up and up. Moving on…
• Special presentation by Assemblyman Anthony Portantino. Suddenly I’m humming “Woke Up This Morning” from The Sopranos. It’s his first time in City Hall, he says. He brings good news from Sac-town. City’s gonna get $2.3 million for street repair. Yay. $95 million going out for permanent housing for the homeless - IE new condos with in-lieu fees paid. Pisan-tino went to school outside of Philly (I’m serious). Brags about bills he got Gov. Terminator to sign. Says something about putting a gun in the toilet at an Italian restaurant for Michael Corleone. Tony “Assembly Line” Portantino talks about money for gang violence. Yeah! Bring in Paul Sorvino and Robert DeNiro, that will totally stop Denva Lanes. I gotta go get the papers, get the papers.
• Portantino says that since it’s the day of his daughter’s wedding, he can accept any requests from the City of Pasadena.
• Gordo minimally calls out Portantino. Gordo will wake up next to a horse’s head tomorrow morning.
• Damn. Holden, McAustin jump on with questions. Now I guess it’s Sock On Italian tonight? Got your marathon shoes?
• Sexy Haderlein asks Portantino about parks. Guy’s gotta walk around without a shirt somewhere, goomba.
• Why does Sexy Haderlein lean on his fist the entire time? He has sexy knuckles.
• God, this Portantino thing is finally fucking over. Moving on….
• Public Comment continues. Spanish lesson time. Translator gets on deck. Senorita represents 90 people who don’t agree with the Planning Commission’s decision about some building. Complains about trees that were cut down on various street corners. Asks for investigation - on a State or County leve - and suggests the whole deal, whatever she’s talking about, is a conflict of interest. This is the part of Public Comment where you make a sandwich. Doesn’t want a building somewhere. Asks Council why they ignore the Latinos. She asks “Because we’re poor? Because you’re Latinos?” She tells Holden not to ask a question when he wants to ask a question. I have the answer: they don’t support you because you’re poor. They also assume because you don’t speak English, that you don’t vote. It sucks, but it’s true. Man, Holden is getting mad Fantasy City Council League points all around tonight.
• From Ann Erdman, Pasadena Public Information Officer:
  from staff desk behind the dais: Girl Scouts are bored and beginning to fidget. Falun Gong guy from Caltech is patiently awaiting his three minutes of Constitution-protected free speech.
• Ooh. Gordo’s gettin’ shot down in Spanish! He’s not responding to anything and Holden is defending him, but smartly. Gordo recuses himself according to State law because he owns property in question. Ok, ok. Nice save, Bogaard.
• STOP SAYING DAIS. IT’S BECOMING ONE OF THOSE LAME POLITICAL BUZZWORDS. Christ.
• MADISON knocks it down for Gordo now..who can’t speak by law. WOW.
• Zoie Zucco from the Girl Scouts speaks. I make a public comment that Zoie’s mom is hot. Zoie calls Holden an “Uncle Tom”. Just kidding, she’s not Issac Richard (Haqq). How many more Z’s can she have in her name?
• McAustin says how awesome the Girl Scouts are. She tells them she’s not a real estate developer and eats a Samoa.
• Jacque mentions how she was unable to meet with the Girl Scouts. Nice attempt at points.
• Here comes Cal Tech guy, John Lee. Ready for his overdue 3 minutes.
• Starts playing soft music - I’M NOT JOKING.
• Talks over the Enya-esque, Dead Can Dance-esque, very soothing music. Says how they meditate in other cities and they don’t get in trouble but in Pasadena, they do. Sad because this music is making me sad while he speaks - it’s so dramatic. I wish I could make this up.
• John Lee schools the Council, says that the police told him to talk to City Council before they take away his music. They’re getting shaken up about China again, this is awesome because Pasadena is going to end up embarassing us all in front of the whole world. Bogaard cuts him off. McAustin talks about permits. People on City Council are such mamby-pamby wusses sometime.
• City Spokeschick Ann Erdman sez: From staff desk behind the horseshoe (notice I didn’t write “dais”): 1. how will city clerk ever include a girl scout cookie in the public record? 2. Falun Gong music is oddly hypnotic. hmmm
• Bogaard says “not long before they complete rest of agenda”. I’m timing.
• Consent Calendar time!
• Item 3.A.1 is removed from Consent Calendar! Feel the action!
• Historic Property Contracts from the outgoing City Manager Cynthia Kurtz. Yawn.
• Sid Tyler punches out guy with really bad speech impediment or Woody Allen accent with the fist he keeps under his part of the “upside down lower case n” as I call it.
• Robin Salzer’s appointment approved without his name mentioned. City Council lick their lips at the chance of free ribs. Ann Erdman and Cynthia Kurtz licks their lips at the thought of making out with Steve Haderlein.
• Maserati Madison has a question about an emergency condo-conversion ordinance, so I’m going to start and finish reading “War & Peace”.
• “Mr. Touchdown” Victor Gordo feels that temporarily banning condo coversions pervents people who otherwise could get into the real estate market (like yours truly) from doing so). Nice.
• City Mouthpiece Chick Ann Erdman tells me a story in the comments because she’s obviously working hard on getting this site banned from all City computers
• Ann Erdman: Oops, I wrote “fee” speech when referring to Falun Gong guy but meant “free” speech. reminds me of a day a few years ago when I was touring a delegation from China through City Hall. We got to the council chamber and someone asked what the public podium was for. I explained about the three minutes, free speech, etc. Next question was about how much money people have to pay to speak for three minutes. That was a real eye-opening moment.
• Why are City officials monitoring my website during Council proceedings?
• Bogaard finishes his Sudoku while Council votes unanimously on the ordinance. Haderlein is “in favor” instead of “Yes” again. Agenda business is complete. Wow..it’s fucking 8:15 p.m. WOW.
• Public comment time!
• Dude from Global Warming group feels empowered by Al Gore’s Nobel Prize. 4:20 was 4 hours ago, my friend. He seriously suggests eating less meat!! Are we fucking serious? Where’s my boy Portantino to beat this guy’s ass down? Raging hippie continues with his Crazy-tutional 3 minutes “don’t eat meat, plant more trees, I’d get my ass kicked in Philly” bullshit. Get a girlfriend, soul patch. Sid Tyler is all ears about the tree portion because the story of Johnny Appleseed was based on his life, with the planting trees part replaced with beating people senseless. Sexy Haderlein’s ears perk up because he heard “trees”. Trees = parks. These guys all have a calling card by now.
• Council chambers are emptier than a Goth club on a Tuesday night (or any night).
• Sewer guy is back from a few weeks ago when Kurtz said they’d get a letter - which they did receive this week. Guy says City of Pasadena doesn’t owe an easement for sewers on his street, Linda Ridge Road. Madison comments coming, I suspect.
• Madison cuts guy off, saying they got his letter. Public comment guy uses the word “pissing match”. He’s gonna get escorted out if he’s not careful.
• Madison asks if we’re at the end of the agenda because his 25 year old stripper girlfriend is waiting.
• Older chick comes up, who I saw last night on Fox 11 news during the China Float protest, talking about a poem she wrote. She wrote it in the voice of Democracy. God help us all. Probably another person who voted for me, sadly.
• Honestly, it’s a great poem…but too artsy of approach. You gotta realize..as I tried in the election - these people do NOT respond to artsy. Unless it’s crap corporate art. You’re going to be seen as a “crazy” although you’re super creative and your poem almost brought me to tears in its truth and honesty. You gotta play the game to win, though. I am not lillywhite…but I’m smart. Bogaard tells her 15 seconds during the awesome part of her poem.
• This chick needs to hang out with Miss Havisham! That would rock.
• Ann Erdman sez: Hey, spokechicks monitor all media, including blogs. Indeed. I’m media now?
• Gang violence. Affordable housing. China in the Rose Parade. Clint Howard’s cousin comes up and speaks about shopping carts and people violating the taking-them-from-the-stores ordinance. Someone needs to take a walk up Hill Ave once in a while to see that ordinance isn’t being enforced. For once, the public is wasting my time.
• Madison mentions the former chairman of that committee made the comment about Mayor Bogaard’s age. Actually, that was the former chariman quoting yours truly.
• Bogaard adjourns meeting, but Council has to go back to Closed Session (see Top Ten List from earlier today).
• Public meeting over circa 8:40 p.m. Shortest meeting to date. Nice theme music closing the meeting by KPAS.

Fantasy City Council League Scoreboard, using the extensive Aaron Proctor Scoring System.
Western Conference

Council Member / Total Points (Points Earned This Week)

1. District 3 - Chris Holden - 43 (10)
2. Mayor Bill Bogaard - 40 (0)
3. District 1 - Jacque Robinson - 32 (5)
4. District 6 - Steve Madison - 16 (10)
***

Eastern Conference

1. District 5 - Victor Gordo - 63 (3)
2. District 4 - Steve Haderlein - 60 (5)
3. District 7 - Sid Tyler - 30 (0)
3 (Tie). District 2 - Margaret McAustin - 30 (5)

Things ramping up before the playoffs.

Lackluster meeting (besides me being alluded to twice). I’m sure Dormitas will have more tomorrow.

- AP

• The meeting starts 20+ minutes late. Young Jacque and City Clerk Jane were the only people on time because the Closed Session took too long.
• Roll Call - McAustin: orginally NOT PRESENT (ends up being tardy)
  
• Ceremonial Stuff. Some award. Bogaard got people to clap for Cynthia Kurtz.
• Swearing in of new CDC peeps. One dude was named Christopher Walker and I thought Bogaard said Christopher Walken. I need more Cowbell!
• Some dude from the PEF was at Public Comment who looked like the late Hal Fishman.
• People were presenting about how they’re having a forum. They gave papers to City Council. Now they have scrap paper. Victor Gordo was the only person who cared.
• Some crazy asshole with a hole in his shirt kept saying how he wasn’t a great guy, how is Grandma ran for the Senate as a Republican in 1932, and gave Cynthia a card. Turns out to be some painter. Reason #4893048309 why I’m separating myself from these lunatics. I didn’t know they let heroin addicts into City Council meetings. This guy makes Zuma Dogg look like Professor Irwin Corey.
• Chinese woman complains about what happened to her earlier at the Tournament of Roses selection for chick who is going to be giving blow jobs for $50 on Craigslist in 10 year - I mean the Rose Queen. She was escorted out by the police during the ceremony after asking a legit question. She wants a public apology from Chief Mercedes-ian. The Associated Press took a photo of her being escorted out. Bogaard said the incident “will be reviewed”. Holden wants to know what the Human Relations Commission is trying to do about all of this Falun Gong stuff.
• Consent Calendar - knocked down in 30 seconds. Fastest action of the night.
• Reports Comments from Council Committees. First - 2008 Budget Admendements. The sexiest Fiscal Budget Amendments ever, presented by SexyLein. It’s an amendment to increase police patrol. Steve Madison starts flexing his 2011 Mayoral campaign muscles, wanting to know where the police patrols will be even though the admendment clearly states it’s city-wide. Wow..they’re spending $500,000 on this! That’s not even 1/5th of what they spent on the Peppermint Gardens go-away-present.
• Ever notice Haderlein sounds like Senator Bob Casey, Jr. from Pennsylvania?
• Maserati Madison intentionally makes Council meetings boring so people like those who read my website won’t be interested and then all of his rich friends can vote him in in 2011. Smooth move, Counselor (spoken in Max Cady voice from either ‘Cape Fear’ film) but I’m not buying it.
• Cynthia Kurtz beams every time Haderlein talks to her. Who could blame her?
• The Moratorium on Condo Conversions is brought up. Tons of people wearing paper pinned to their lapels saying “No Net Loss” in Philadelphia Flyer-black-and-orange. Chick gets up and complains about the helicopters flying over District 1. Guess she doesn’t realize they fly over Districts 2, 5, and 3 as well. Guess what? Those helicopters make me feel safer.
• Nearly 2 hours spent on the Condo Conversions. Holden says affordable housing is being diminished due to Condo Conversions. Here, here. City Spokeschick Ann Erdman, sitting behind Holden, looks like she’s praying when she folds her hands. The maximum time for this moratorium is 45 days - according to City Attorney Michele Bagnerius. Gordo points out about most people (54.2% exactly) in the City being renters (like me). McAustin finally shows up. Sid looks at McAustin with a “shut the fuck up” look when she goes on and on about not enough parking at apartment units - sounds like she’s stealing part of my Mayoral platform.
• I fell asleep for about 45 minutes. No joke.
• Woke up. Old chick talking in public comment saying the AARP doesn’t support this moratorium. City Council basically tells her to fuck off. Tons of people supporting the moratorium in attendance.
• Every time someone leaves the Council chambers and slams the door, the camera shakes.
• Most people there - except for some Pasadena Pundit-esque guy named Mr. Winter (Egdar Winter?) support the Moratorium.
• The 54% start to speak. Then a pirate spoke (some chick in an eye patch). Michelle White, who hosted the infamous Affordable Housing forums at the end of the Primary Election, used the “Rent Control” word. Saying “rent control” is worse than a guy wearing eyeliner.
• McAustin didn’t know the # of affordable housing units in Pasadena. Pretending like she isn’t a real estate developer, pretending like she cares, pulling a Madison and seeming like she’s not fond of this moratorium but saving face for her possible run at Mayor in 2011.
• People forget McAustin is a junior Councilmember, too.
• WHAT HAPPENED TO GETTING RID OF DEVELOPER IN-LIEU FEES? Jacque? Jacque? Bueller? Anyone?
• Sid Tyler was quiet until the end of the night. Robinson finally speaks around 9:10 p.m.
• Talk about Heritage Square selection process. Robinson wants to know who is the committee for the selection of a developer comprised of? Do you want to chair that committee as well?
• Yankees knocked out of the playoffs, Bills fuck it up against the Cowboys
• Haderlein and Kurtz go back and forth about Developers. More time wasting.
• Gordo gets points for explaining to McAustin the difference between a RFQ and an RFP. Nice.
• 2011 Mayoral Candidates: McAustin, Madison, possibly Gordo
• McAustin uses the word “caveat” and loses points for being bourgeois.
• Old people try to discuss Internet technology and how websites work. Hilarious shit.
• Tyler would rather be deer hunting right now.
• Madison has probably texted every Asian stripper in the Los Angeles Metropolitan area by now.
• Blah, blah, blah.
• Bogaard smiles like a school-girl whenever Jacque has a question.
• How dare The Not-NBC News Asst. City Manager Brian Williams call Sid “Mr. Tyler”? He’s going to get his head roundhouse kick-ed off after the meeting. Go get `em, Sid!
• Bogaard mentions how every time the developer team gets a developer over a cocktail, they tell them how great they are. Well, maybe they shouldn’t have cocktails?
• Michelle White speaks again (she’s a trooper!) and the City Council Chambers have more empty air than Paris Hilton’s vagina.
• Don’t know if I mentioned this, but Haderlein got schooled a little bit tonight. The students teaching the teacher, eh?
• Holden and Kurtz seem sleepy. It’s past 9:30 p.m. now.
• Wait..is Cynthia Kurtz drunk?
• Design commission meeting hasn’t started yet. It’s 9:45 p.m. Tyler’s South Lake Parking Commission ordinance is up now. Haderlein still says “In Favor” instead of “Yes”. Bogaard schedules Public Comment for later since the Design Commission has been waiting since 8 p.m. Chris Holden leaves the meeting at 9:45 because he has business issues! Did Chris Hansen show up at his ex-wife’s house? Before he leaves, he gives mad props to Col. Kurtz.
• “Dais” is the word of the week.
• Council approves moratorium. People dancing in the streets.
• Joint Meeting with the Design Commission. Bogaard apologizes for keeping us up late. Hell yeah! They acually TAKE 5-10 MINUTES TO SWITCH THEIR SEATS! People forget their mics are on. I hear someone congratulating Cynthia on her departure and people talking to Bogaard. Bogaard complains that one of the chairs in the conference room seems to lose air and then KPAS finally turns the volume down on the microphones.
• Design Commission talks about how they don’t want to give Pasadena an “Orange County” feel. I hate Orange County, so I agree with that wholeheartedly. However, have they ever been to the Paseo? It’s past 10:00 p.m. now.
• Madison makes a lame joke and starts a question that he thinks is “too granular” or “too specific” IE: “You got 15 minutes?”
• Design Commission talks about trees forever. Talk about “Forest for the trees”.
• 10:45 p.m. More talk about trees. Are they saying “UFAC” or “UFAG”? Thanks for ruining my joke, Ann - I knew it was UFAC Ann - pass Steve Haderlein a note that he’s in 2nd place in the FCCL again
• Meh, it’s past 11. Some of us have jobs in the morning - they should really start these marathon meetings earlier or SOMETHING - unless they seriously don’t want the public to care about what’s going on! I have a lot of stamina (just ask the ladies) but even this is too much for me! I’m gonna end here for now.

Fantasy City Council League Standings:

Western Conference

Council Member / Total Points (Points Earned This Week)

1. Mayor Bill Bogaard - 40 (0)
2. District 3 - Chris Holden - 33 (10)
3. District 1 - Jacque Robinson - 27 (5)
4. District 6 - Steve Madison - 6 (0)
***

Eastern Conference

1. District 5 - Victor Gordo - 60 (10)
2. District 4 - Steve Haderlein - 55 (0)
3. District 7 - Sid Tyler - 30 (10)
4. District 2 - Margaret McAustin - 25 (0)

Chris Holden catches up in the West, Victor Gordo re-claims the East as McAustin falls to last place. Madison’s lookin’ like the Oakland Raiders. It’s almost playoff time, folks!

UPDATE: As always, here’s Dormitas’ take.

- AP

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